Blind Faith

Over the last few days, I've been almost dreading this trip. It's funny to me that it's the opportunity of a lifetime, but it's the pull of everyday, normal life that makes me want to stay. However, I still know that God has led thus far, and I continue to trust His leading.

We (Amanda and I) strongly felt that God was planning to use this time to teach us both some difficult but important things. We believed (and still do) that He was inviting us into this time to wrestle with these as yet unknown issues. But, increasingly, I'm recognizing that much of that "dealing" may be hard - even painful. And I'm flinching a bit as I prepare...

Knowing how I feel, the fact that "for the joy set before Him" Jesus endured the cross is even more incredible to me. Just the simple anticipation of this trip is difficult - I can't even imagine that last turn towards Jerusalem, knowing that there would be no "return flight". To the best of my knowledge, I'll be returning from Italy right on time, with no issues. He knew there would be no trip back. What was that anticipation like?

Faith is such an interesting thing. The motive for this trip is a belief that God has directed both Amanda and I. The way that we live our lives is directed wholly by the fact that we believe that God has a plan for us. Each significant decision - and increasingly, the less significant ones - are submitted before God, and we seek to follow Him. And yet, we've never seen this direction, at least not in the way most would think - we haven't heard God's voice, haven't had a face to face conference in which we've received His clear Word to us on these issues, haven't seen writing in the sky (or on a wall). And we have no idea what life would look like if we didn't live it this way. Might it look the same? Totally different? In faith, I believe the latter... There's something good about being able to put complete blind faith in a God who's bigger than me, knows more than me, and has a plan that's broader than I can see. Some would say that's a crutch. I don't see it that way. On most days, I firmly believe that life would be "easier" without faith - but I also believe that life is far better with it.

I believe it by faith.

Settling...

As I've been preparing to preach Sunday, I've been spending a lot of time thinking about ways that we settle. Times that we could have so much more, but because we're so easily contented, we settle with far less. For instance, God has promised us fullness of life in Jesus. However, so often I'm content with a half-hearted faith - one that will "get me through" but not mess up my life too much. By my contentedness, I've settled, and I've missed the "all" that God has for me.

The idea, of course, is not new. C.S. Lewis spoke about it in detail in his essay "The Weight of Glory", and Chesterton as well in his classic "Orthodoxy". But how does it work out practically? How can my life not be one that "settles", and how can I encourage friends, family, etc. not to settle as well? I long for a radical faith that believes God at His Word - and at my best times, I believe I do. But far more often, I'm content with far too little. "Content to play in the mud when a holiday at sea is offered" is how Lewis put it, simply because I couldn't possibly fathom what a holiday at the sea could possibly mean.

Despite the efforts of the Christian marketing machine, there's absolutely nothing that can "add" to Jesus and give us more. However, there's so much more of Jesus that we have never even bothered to access, all because we're just fine, thank you. Lord, help us to change. And please - me first.

The Update

Well, it turns out that adding a six year old boy, five year old boy, and three year old boy, all dressed as stars and dancing makes everything sound just a little better! Here's the final performance - you can leave the sound up this time! For the most part...

Beautiful music...

Or something like it. Here are Tia and her friend Michaela preparing for the 2nd grade talent show. Don't you remember when life was this simple? (Caution: sound low is probably the best option for this one...)


In other news, I talked with Juan last night, and I'm definitely getting excited about the non-cycling aspects of this trip. Just being with he and Mario, as well as meeting everyone else will be great. I'm planning to journal thoughts and impressions while I'm there, and my guess is that I'll write just as much about my conversations with them as I will about the Italian scenery. And even more about my aching thighs and my extremely painful... you know...

Why am I doing this again?

Preparations

Sometimes I wonder if the hell of preparation for a trip is actually worth the joy of the trip itself. I'm thrilled to be going to Italy, but the stress of getting ready is really a pain!

I did find out that campgrounds in Europe are much nicer than in the US, so we're looking at very nice bathrooms, restaurants, stores, etc. Too bad they don't have walls, A/C, and a bed... Oh wait, that's a hotel. Either way, it appears that I'll live through that.

Training is tough - it rains too much for significant training in April, so I don't really get the miles in that I need to. Hopefully that doesn't mean that I'll pass out on top of the first mountain. I also need to drop a few pounds so I don't need to carry them over said mountains - dropping 10 would certainly make for an easier climb.

My heart prep is the hardest though. In the busyness, I don't get the time away for contemplation and true preparation in that sense. Of course, even if I did, I'm not really sure how to prepare. I know that I need to hear from God in some key ways during this time, and I believe that He will be speaking to both Amanda and I quite a bit. However, I'm not sure how to really get ready. Maybe I shouldn't work so hard at all of this stuff...

Going to Italy

Well, it doesn't take much investigation to figure out that this blogging thing never caught on with me. However, I'm happy to say that when I finally needed it, my blog was still here for me! In just a few weeks, I'm going to be taking the trip of a lifetime - 3 1/2 weeks riding bikes through much of the country of Italy! We'll take off from Venice (northeast Italy), ride through much of the Italian Alps, into Milan, and proceed to make what's basically a giant "S" through the country, ending with an epic 120 mile ride into the coliseum at Rome.

So, this is going to be the home for my "stuff" from those travels. Some of my preparation thoughts, my trip pics, videos, and ideas, and communication back home.

My two oldest kids, Kristia and Ethan, will also be following my journey with their classes (2nd grade and Kindergarten, respectively). Some posts may relate directly to them and their classes.

So, what was once a worthless, unused blog will now be the very busy home of lots of happenings... At least for the next few months. Then I probably won't touch it again for another few years...